things i am loving

The way our son looks at us when we talk to him. I wondered if he'd recognize our voices after he was born. There is no doubt in my mind that he does.

His increasing periods of wakefulness. He's getting more into a eat/wake/sleep pattern...instead of eat/sleep/eat/sleep.

How he tries to hold his head up when we're burping him, but it quickly lands back on our shoulder. I didn't realize they would start having neck "control" so soon.

Those first moments after I unswaddle him from a sound sleep to nurse him. His arm immediately shoot up over his head for a biiiig stretch and those sweet waking up faces he makes at the same time.

The sweet subtle smiles he gives us when we're cooing at him.

Guessing whether his eyes will in fact, be blue. I know it takes several months for their eyes to find their color, but most days they clearly look blue, not gray.

How he's changing before our eyes. Well, it's bittersweet. If he's changing so fast already... how fast will this all go by?? Slow down, little man!

The cuddles and snuggles throughout the day. Laying him on my chest while he works into the most snuggly position with his face in my neck.

Fumbling around at changing a diaper/putting on a onesie/swaddling him tight is slowly getting less fumbly. (New word).

How he seems to be just taking it all in. Looking around more and more at the things around him. Right now the distance he can see is limited, but he's definitely looking.

That Baxter seems to be taking all of this in stride. I'll be honest, I didn't know how it'd all workout because I didn't want Baxter to feel neglected. But he seems to be doing good! He'll sniff Christian's toes every once in a while, but he mostly ignores him. And we continue to give him lots of love.

Christian's "milk coma" arms. They go from all curled up, flailing around, and me usually battling them while trying to nurse him, to completely limp by his sides.

He can go from crying and fussy to asleep in a matter of seconds.

How I'm getting used to planning my day in 2-3 hour segments revolved around him feeding.

Watching Rob be the most amazing and loving dad. The way he sweetly kisses Christian, the way he tells him (jokingly!) to "stop crying like a baby," the way he puts him on his chest to sleep. And how my love for him as my husband has deepened just from watching him interact with Christian.

{the "why are you waking me up?" faces of Christian Reid Makana}

Oh dear... There's so much more and I absolutely don't want to forget these moments. The details of my labor and delivery are slowly slipping away too. People said this would happen... it's so you'll continue to procreate, I guess. Ha! Eventually, I'll get around to telling my birth story - it was basically nothing like I expected. Since a lot of people have asked me, yes, it was 100% drug free, but with every Lamaze technique I learned right out the window. More on that later.

milk coma

I absolutely love nursing my little man, and I think we're finally (mostly) getting the hang of it. As natural as it is, it does not come naturally. We're still working on it, but since he's gaining weight right on track, it seems he's definitely getting a full belly. Oh, this is also a pretty good sign too... it cracks us up every time.

my world

more later...

39 weeks

{top of Makapuu}

Not too much to say really. I'm officially in my "last week" of pregnancy, but totally understand it could go on for another 2 weeks past my due date. I honestly canNOT fathom being pregnant for almost another month without feeling like I'll cry, so I'm not even going to think about it. Right now I have a "one day at a time" mentality, and fully accept that I have no reason to complain until after August 23rd. And honestly, I've had an "easy" pregnancy. No complications. Not as miserably uncomfortable as some people say they are. The doctor was impressed that we hiked Makapuu the other day. "The whole thing?" Yep. And I loved the looks of fellow hikers, especially on our way back down. They're thinking, "if she can do it then I know I can." It's really not that hard - about a mile up at a pretty good incline, but it's paved the whole way. In all honestly, I did that hike to get that baby moving in the downward position, and have been walking and sitting on the exercise ball almost everyday to also "help" the process. In reality, no matter what I do, the baby will come when the baby is ready... whenever that may be.

I had one "trial run" to Labor & Delivery that ended with a 7 hour stay in triage and no baby. Eh, oh well. It was good practice... I immediately remembered 3 things I forgot while I was there, and have now made a list of those things - my glasses, vitamins, pillows/blankets for Rob - that is taped to the cabinet.

I am still slowly making progress and am almost 5cm dilated. Which to me, is crazy. I'm not in active labor... or any labor for that matter. It was thought on Thursday, when I went to L&D, that I might have been in early labor... but I really don't know anymore.

So yep, that's it. Nothing really excited to report. Still here. Still pregnant. But VERY excited to meet our baby boy.

38 weeks

{most days}

I've come to realize that a due date actually means... nothing. Whatsoever. I'm 38 weeks today, have been consistently measuring one week ahead for the past few weeks. Now I'm back to "on schedule" but the doctor still thinks baby boy will come early. BUT NOT BEFORE THE 20TH!!

Before a few days ago I had been cruising a long with no signs of labor. And then like a switch, things started to change. The baby is moving almost non-stop. I've had more frequent and intense Braxton Hicks contractions. I had enough last night that I tried to time them (just in case this was the real deal)... but they were so random and inconsistent I gave up. Two people said it looked like I had "dropped" - meaning the baby is more engaged in my pelvis. The pressure is more than before, but not too bad. Bonus! Dropped baby = less heartburn. But to go ahead and cancel out that bonus because my bathroom trips have gone from 100 times during the night to 300 times during the night. 

This is also my last week at work. And then I will soon be entering the stay-at-home-mom chapter of my life, which I couldn't be more thrilled about.

Rob's parents will be arriving this weekend. VERY excited about this! This puts me at a little more ease, especially if having this baby is going to happen at any moment... and Rob happens to be out of the country or on the mainland. With that being said, I have completely faith that it'll all work out.

Yesterday I had a hair appointment and left with fresh highlights and a haircut. Even though I still feel like a blob... now I feel like a fabulous blob. Last night we rounded out the day with dinner with our friends Jayme and Joel, and their two adorable kids. Since Jayme had a boy a few months ago, we decided that her baby boy and our baby boy are going to be best friends. 

What an exciting adventure!! 

the tour

We finally got to take the "maternity" tour at our hospital. Luckily for us, my doctor's office is actually at the hospital, so I'm quite familiar with the layout - I've just never been to the maternity floors. And since our hospital is a speciality "women and children's" hospital, it's very well catered to... having babies! It's also the only hospital in Hawaii with a Level 3 NICU, so I know our baby would be in good hands if, God forbid, he needed to go to the NICU.

When we entered a "labor and delivery" room, I was excited to see it was pretty spacious. I was also pleasantly surprised that the nurse giving the tour was very encouraging about the room being "natural birth friendly." (I've been on the defense thinking that since I'm having the baby at a hospital - as opposed to a birth center or at home - no one would be supportive of our choice to go unmedicated. Luckily, this doesn't seem to be true at all). There's room to have a birthing ball (exercise ball), a shower/jacuzzi where you can sit and a "waterfall" will pour down your back, and other tools available, to help ease labor pain and contractions! I am SO excited about this because I know these things will all be helpful in my goal of having an unmedicated birth. And I don't have to deliver laying on my back - which totally goes against gravity. 

We got to see the nursery and there were a few brand new babies in there. My heart completely melted when I saw these babies and the dads in the nursery snapping photos. They were all so tiny!! And when I looked at Rob, he was grinning from ear to ear. I am in love. I think this made us both more excited than we've ever been to meet our little man. 

The hospital also has a professional photographer come in to take pictures of our brand new baby, free of charge. Of course, if we want prints, we'll have to buy them. But, they give us a link that we can give to friends/family, with all the photos. I love the idea of a professional photos of our baby just hours after entering the world. 

After baby is here, I'll be moved to another floor where we'll be until discharged. Typical discharge is 48 hours after a normal delivery, or 96 hours after a cesarean birth. The nurse also mentioned, it could be shorter or longer depending on many factors. Our doctor said we could leave after 24 hours as long as everything looked good! On the night before leaving, the hospital prepares a "special meal" and our choices are all kinds of fancy.... steak, salmon, something else...lots of sides, desserts. Can't remember, but it didn't sound half bad. Did I forget to mention free wi-fi on both maternity floors? 

I'm glad we ended up taking the tour because that night we weren't feeling motivated to go. It was definitely informational and very encouraging for me. Being the Type-A personality I am, I like to be prepared and know where things are ahead of time, and what to expect. For the record, not knowing when our little man is going to make his presence is a little nerve-wracking, but we know whenever it is, the timing will be perfect...and I'll know exactly where to go! 

I would like to wish my husband, the most amazing man I've ever known, a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY... and hopefully no red-eye to Pago Pago tonight. God could not have brought into my life a more understanding and loving man to be my husband and baby daddy. I am one lucky gal! 

{hot surfer boy}

{yeah, he flies these}

No seriously, I won. 

Happy birthday, my love!