happy aloha friday!

Ok, so it's been a while. Sorry about that. Life has been busy, and I'm tired. 

But, happy aloha Friday! It's Friday! Yay! 

Tuesday we spent the day at the Ko'olina Lagoons with our dear friends April and Kanoa. Christian and Kanoa had an absolute blast playing in the water. The lagoons are really the perfect spot for kids, except one minor (major) detail. No umbrellas or half-tents allowed (ridiculous) which means, basically no shade whatsoever. HOWEVER, we did discover that at Lagoon 3 (there are 4 of them), which is attached to the Marriott, allows you to rent umbrellas and lounge chairs for the day. So rent we did. 

Cora had her weigh-in yesterday and I am happy to report that she's up to 11lbs, 14oz., which is fantastic! I'm still nursing as much as I can, pumping a few times a day, and supplementing when I need to. Apparently it's working, although I have to give my hospital pump back in a few days, so I'm not sure how the pumping situation will continue. (I do have a pump, but it's nowhere near as good or efficient as the hospital one.) Cora is also 3 months old! More on that milestone to come...! :)

I've gotten back into a routine of working out. It feels SO GOOD. It hurts SO GOOD. I've been running, walking, lifting weights, and utilizing the many exercise DVDs I have in my arsenal. I have about 20lbs I want to lose. I've been eating realistically clean, and tracking my food in MyFitnessPal. I've also been journaling my experience, like in an actual notebook using an ink pen, which I've never done before. 

Today I'm off to the salon to hopefully finish up my transition into blonde. Platinum blonde. Here's a few pictures I've used for my inspiration. Cheeee!

If it comes out like I hope it does, then I'll share a picture later. Hah. This will be my 3rd appointment transitioning to this level of blonde, after dying my hair an auburn color. Which is a really stubborn color to remove. I'm in need of an excellent deep conditioner... 

Tonight we're celebrating Rob's birthday at Mimi and Papa's house. His birthday isn't for a few days, but he'll be working allllllll next week. Speaking of next week, my former roommate from Santa Barbara will be coming into town! She's going to be staying with us for the week before we leave for Virginia, and she'll be house/Baxter sitting for a good chunk of while we're gone. I'm so excited to see her! I haven't seen her in quite a few years, so it'll be good to catch up with her! 

Have a wonderful weekend!! Happy Aloha Friday! 

happy aloha friday!

Happy Aloha Friday!

{Maui}

Whenever I start an Aloha Friday post, I just need to finish it, because the one I wrote this morning (and didn't finish) is totally irrelevant right now. Anyway.

THANK GOD FOR GRANDPARENTS.

Mimi saw my S.O.S. flare via Facebook and called to ask I may need help while Rob was gone on a trip. YES. YES I DO. So, she came over to this side of the island and completely entertained Christian while I tended to Cora yesterday, and spent the night. And fed Cora in the middle of the night after I nursed her and while I pumped. And guess who's on his way over for a sleepover tonight? Papa!! We couldn't be more blessed to have grandparents close by that help us out as much as they can whenever they can.

This morning we all went to Moanalua Gardens. I was so so so happy to get a text from Jayme this morning asking if they could join us at the gardens! We all had a blast, and I don't get to see Jayme nearly enough.

Did I mention that it is HOT HOT HOT here? Like, east coast hot. Gross. 

So, I definitely want to post some pictures from our quick trip to Portland, which was a BLAST. I love love loved Portland. We got to visit some of our LA friends from our "no kids" bible study, back when none of us had kids. They were actually vacationing in Portland, and the house they found on Airbnb was such a score! Complete with a creek that was a former salmon hatchery in the backyard. Because Portland. 

That circle of friends was with us during such an important and crazy time in our lives, and they are just so special to us. Heart = full. 

We also got to stay with some friends, that actually stayed with us back in March. February? I don't remember. But I do remember how much fun we had and how much I love them too! I don't have any pictures because that was Cora's post surgery day and I think I just held her all day while sitting on the couch while the kiddos played. 

Well then, let me go ahead and send this out to the internet world before I run out of time and it's no longer Friday. 

Have a wonderful weekend! 

happy aloha friday!

Oh, heyyyyyy Friday, HEY!

I can't believe FRIDAY is HERE! This was the slowest and fastest week I've had in a while. I can't believe that just one week ago, I was learning that our daughter wasn't thriving, and cried so many tears. To be fair, I've been crying off and on all week for various reasons. It had been a while so I was due for a good cleansing of the sorts. The man (Isak Dinesen) that said, "The cure for anything is salt water - sweat, tears, or the sea," was right on.

Cora has a weight check today and I think the doctor will be quite pleased. My dear friend Melissa loaned me her baby scale that she used with her son, and Cora is steadily gaining. And pooping. Lots and lots of pooping.

This week has been very hard, but it has also completely opened my eyes to what a wonderful group of supportive, loving, kind, caring group of moms I have the pleasure of calling my friends. My village. Constant text messages, Facebook messages, phone calls, words of support, prayers, personal stories of also having to supplement, breastfeeding woes, and how unpredictable motherhood really can be. There's a lot of "mommy wars" going on out there that can really beat a mom up for choosing whether out of necessity or not to use formula, to breastfeed, to cloth diaper, to use disposables, to WHATEVER. No matter what you choose, someone will always have an opinion against it. I felt an insane amount of guilt of having to supplement with formula, BUT you know what, I am doing what is best for Cora, and that is THE ONLY THING that matters. Mommy wars be damned! But my group of friends? None of that here. They're wonderful, supportive women who know how damn hard this motherhood job is, and we're all doing what is best for our babies. No guilt and no feeling like a failure for doing what is best for our keiki. THANK YOU FRIENDS for all the encouragement and support!! I wouldn't have gotten through this week without you.

You know what else helped me get through this week? The Astronaut Wives Club.

This is a new show on ABC, and it is golden. My new favorite. (Thank you Leah for the recommendation. (Whenever Leah recommends a TV show, I watch it.) Last night the fourth episode aired, and I just can't get enough! I am most definitely reading the book this show is based on.

Tomorrow we leave for Portland, so naturally, lots of packing and stuff to do today. Christian has spent the past two nights over at Mimi & Papa's house, and I know he's had a blast. A trip to the zoo, an evening swimming at the pool, Star Wars battles with Papa, and playing with his favorite race track at their house... I wonder if he'll even want to come home. :) It takes a village. Thank you so much Mimi and Papa! Christian spending the night over there while Rob was on a trip really allowed me to focus on Cora. And pumping. And pumping. And more pumping.  

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone! Happy Aloha Friday! 

meanwhile in Portland...

So we're not there yet, BUT we are leaving for Portland on Saturday, and I am very very excited for many many reasons, besides the very obvious reason of getting Cora's tongue tie fixed. I have never been to Portland. I have been to the airport a thousand times. But I never actually had a layover in Portland. So, this will technically be my first time IN Portland.

We will arrive late Saturday evening and check into a hotel in downtown Portland. We'll stay there for 2 nights, and Monday we will stay with friends - Rob's college roommate and his wife and their beautiful family. I met his roommate years ago when we went to a wedding in Costa Rica for another one of his/their college roommates. And within the past few years, we had the pleasure of meeting his wife when they would come to Hawaii for her job. (Everyone needs a job that brings them to Hawaii once a year, right?) Anyway, they came to Hawaii a few months ago and stayed with us a few nights. We had a BLAST. They are just such wonderful, genuine people, and if everyone from Portland is like that, then I believe I could pick up in an instant and live there. True story. They are that awesome. We'll be heading back to Honolulu on Tuesday, and promptly upon landing, head to our chiropractor so Cora can get Craniosacral Therapy.

I am on a pretty intense nurse, pump, nurse, pump, nurse, pump schedule to in the very least maintain what little supply I have until Cora can latch and nurse efficiently, which will hopefully get my supply back up. I'm actually trying to increase my supply by way of Lactation Support pills, fenugreek (I currently smell like maple syrup... pancakes anyone?), oatmeal every single morning mixed with flaxseed, drinking TONS of water, power pumping with a hospital pump, and as of yesterday...LACTATION COOKIES! Oh sweet mercy, they are delicious, and I probably ate eight too many.

Two nights ago I got the sweetest text from a friend who said she had read my blog and baked me lactation cookies. And if you're not familiar with lactation cookies, they're basically like regular cookies, just with a few extra ingredients that are known to up milk supply, like oats and Brewer's yeast. Although this isn't the exact recipe she used, it's very close.)

Back to Portland.

We debated back and forth for a while on whether to bring Christian because we knew it would be a pretty quick trip. We weren't sure how the weekend and doctor's appointment would play out, or how long we would be gone. In the end, we decided to make a fun little impromptu family trip out of it, and we're just gonna roll with it!

As I was trying to say above, since I'm on this pretty rigid schedule where I'm pumping and nursing every few hours, I'm not sure how much we'll be able to do. I basically feel like I'm on lockdown at home right now, but one thing I know FOR ABSOLUTE SURE, is a stop into Voodoo Doughnuts. Christian has already informed us that he wants the Captain my Captain and The Loop doughnuts. And every other doughnut topped with cereal. We also plan on taking a tour of the Widmer Brothers Brewery. We actually have their Hefeweizen on tap right now. I wonder if they have a dark beer... you know, in the name of increasing my milk supply. :)

Cora's appointment is first thing Monday morning. I don't anticipate that it'll take very long, just from what I've heard from my friend's experiences. THANK YOU everyone for sharing their experiences with us. It eases my mama mind!

I would say Cora is plumping up nicely this week. I've been trying to nurse as much as possible, even more than I had been previously. Since my supply has dropped, she gets a little frustrated, so that's definitely hard and emotional for me. Don't even ask me how many times I've cried this week. Or today. I supplement each feeding with a bottle. I try my very hardest to pump enough milk for each of these feedings, but I don't always get enough. When I don't, I will usually mix what I have with formula. This morning she weighed in at 10lbs 3oz, which is up about 11oz since Friday.

This is life right now. It's been a very emotional week, and we're all taking it day by day. I'm trying to keep this all in perspective. If this is the worst thing we ever have to deal with, then we are very blessed, which I already know to be true. 

answers!!!

WE HAVE ANSWERS!!!! Praise God!

I didn't make it to church this morning but God sent an angel to my house in the form of a Lactation Consultant.

So here's the scoop.

Cora has a tongue tie and a lip tie. The LC was able to see that almost right away. She then showed it to me, and yeah, it's pretty darn obvious. This is what the Mayo Clinic has to say about it:

Tongue-tie (ankyloglossia) is a condition present at birth that restricts the tongue's range of motion.

With tongue-tie, an unusually short, thick or tight band of tissue (lingual frenulum) tethers the bottom of the tongue's tip to the floor of the mouth. A person who has tongue-tie might have difficulty sticking out his or her tongue. Tongue-tie can also affect the way a child eats, speaks and swallows, as well as interfere with breast-feeding.

It all makes sense. I seriously had a moment of enlightenment. The excessive spitting up, the no pooping, the drop in my milk supply (which I suspected a few weeks ago), and most importantly, the lack of weight gain.

Cora can't latch properly, and therefore isn't taking in much milk. Today she nursed for 30 minutes and took in less than an ounce. Poor baby. It breaks my heart. I had my very last bottle of pumped breastmilk in the fridge, so I fed her that, and then I was able to pump some more to give to her right away.

I had the suspicion about 2 weeks or so ago that my supply was dropping. I don't know exactly WHY I thought this, but I did. (Mother's intuition is a very real thing.) I am trying to lose the baby weight, but I was being VERY careful not to restrict too much (hardly at all) and I wasn't exercising a lot either, so I really didn't think that was the culprit. But now I know. Baby's not taking in milk, so my body is responding to the "lack of demand," and therefor my supply has tanked.

Until TODAY Cora hadn't pooped in 10 days. Yep, 10 days. Breastfed babies systems are very effective and efficient at digesting the milk, and going without pooping for a week isn't uncommon. But 10 days seemed a bit long. Since Friday afternoon, I've been ripping through my supply of frozen breastmilk and giving it to her after I nurse. And today, she pooped. Moms know how exciting this can be. I make no apologies.

Cora also spits up quite a bit. I brought it up with the doctor and she asked all he appropriate "is it reflux" questions and it really didn't seem like it was. She never ever acted like it was painful. BUT NOW I KNOW that since she's working so hard to nurse, and gulping in lots of air, it causes her to spit-up.

I mean, it's like I could hear the angels singing from above while all of a sudden the lights turned on.

So, what's our next step? It's a pretty big one. She mentioned a pediatric dentist on the island that she recommends to cut the tie. He's the only one on the island that does it by laser. But then she started talking about the Guru of Tongue Ties that has an office in Portland. He's an ENT surgeon and according to his website, one of the only ENT surgeons in the US who uses an in-office laser treatment for assisting babies to latch on to the breast, in addition to treating older children and adults for certain dental and speech issues. All of his interest in this area stems from personal experience when his daughters had issues breastfeeding. So guess where we're going? (Hopefully.) Yep, to Portland! And hopefully this week. I'm calling his office tomorrow morning right away to hopefully get in for treatment. The LC was going to contact him tonight and let him know that we were going to be calling.

Also, tomorrow I'm picking up a hospital grade breast pump rental from the hospital. The pumps in the hospital are crazy good and will hopefully get my supply back up. Meanwhile, I will continue to offer Cora the breast. The LC suggested 12x a day! Wowza. I will continue to supplement with pumped breast milk, and yes... formula. I physically cannot pump enough to keep up with her demand especially since my supply has dropped so low. I did lots of research and feel that the best formula I can get here (in the US) is by The Honest Company, which is organic and non-GMO.

I fed her her first bottle of formula today, and she sucked it down like she was... starving.

This is a happy baby with a FULL tummy - staring and smiling at the fan while mommy pumps. 

Let it be known that she has gained about 4 ounces in the past two days, just off my pumped milk. She gained 5 ounces last MONTH. It breaks my heart to even think about it. I feel so terrible over it, but I am so happy we have answers and am hopeful that we'll get this ALL figured out, and I'll be back to nursing her with no problems after the surgery. Which is very quick and easy from what I hear.

So that's it. That's where we stand. Thank you to the friends who have reached out and prayed for and encouraged us. Because honestly, I was rotating between states of panic and crying. It wasn't pretty, and thankfully it was short lived.

AND hopefully in a few days I will be taking a picture with the Portland Airport carpet. Yes, it's a thing. Because Portland.

2 months!

Our precious Cora is 2 months old! Technically, 9 weeks today (which is Saturday, but who knows when I'll actually finish and publish this), but who's counting? (We are, obviously.) She had her 2 month well-baby visit yesterday, and it was less than stellar as some of you already know. More about that later.

Weight: 9lbs 8.8oz
Length: 23.5 inches

Cora is truly an easy baby. She actually sleeps on her back, in her bassinet, without any protest. She's still giving us a longer stretch of sleep at night from about 9pm - 2am, but up pretty frequently after 2am. She is full of smiles, and almost always happy. I think she's got total 2nd child syndrome, and is happily carted around to all of Christian's activities. But she even had her first official playdate with all the other 2015 babies in my MOMs Club! Was so much fun! (The older siblings got to play on the giant playscape.)

She's not a fan of tummy time on the floor, but loves it on our chest. She lifts her head way up and looks around, and being carried upright is her favorite so she can see all the things around her. Besides being carried in the wrap, OF COURSE. She sure loves being snuggled up close to me in that thing, and with daddy in the Ergo.

Last month we had the awesome pleasure of seeing Billy and Pablo. They picked up a Honolulu layover to meet Cora, and I miss those guys so much!!

We've had a few fun beach days this past month as well! 

Big brother Christian loves to smother her with kisses, sometimes quite literally, which often requires intervention. He loves her, and she certainly seems to love him too. She can't take her eyes off of him when he's around and especially if he's treating her with some interaction.

Ok, so more on her well-baby visit. We've always noticed that Cora is a small(ish) baby. She was born at 7lbs 13oz, so not incredibly small, but by the time she was one month old we knew she wasn't nearly the size that Christian was at one month. That is obviously totally fine. Every child is different. She was gaining weight appropriately, along the curve, and everyone was happy. Yay. 

By two months old, I noticed that she was still quite small, but didn't think much of it. She nurses fine, is happy, sleeps well, and has a great temperament. She's very laid back. Maybe "too laid back." Clearly a trait she gets from Rob. At her 2 month appointment, she had only gained 5oz., putting her still on the chart, but not following the curve like she had the month before. Cora is exclusively breastfed, and I feed on demand, which is usually every 2-3 hours. 

* So, sorry (not sorry) if this sounds rude because I don't intend for it to, I promise, but none of this is said to solicit advice. I fully trust our pediatrician and her team. They are fabulous, and we 100% trust their many years of medical training. Yes, there are friends and family and avenues that I have reached out to, and I also trust and appreciate their opinions. :) *

The goal is for Cora to gain weight and be healthy! Through many tears and feeling like a failure at the doctor's office yesterday, her pediatrician was very reassuring that I was NOT a failure, and that she is not overly concerned at this point, especially since in the first month she gained weight just fine. This could be caused by quite a few things - my supply may be low, she may not be latching properly, spitting up, or she's a "lazy" nurser. She NEVER pushed formula. Not once. Obviously she presented it as an option, but never said we had to go that route. My doctor's office is very pro-breastfeeding. She also said that it's important that I, ME, THIS MOM RIGHT HERE, is also happy and doing what I feel is best for us - whether that includes formula, pumping more, or whatever it may be to help Cora gain weight.  

But still, the fact remains, Cora needs to beef up. I wish I could cut out all the fat from my thighs and give it to her. But alas, her pediatrician gave me a few other ideas, and here's where we stand. Tomorrow a certified Lactation Consultant is coming to my house to work with Cora and I for a few hours. She'll bring a scale, I'll nurse Cora, and we'll see how much breastmilk she's actually ingesting. She'll check her latch, and we'll talk about some ideas to get her weight up. 

In the meantime, I am nursing and trying to keep her from falling asleep while eating. I'm listening to make sure she's actually swallowing milk. And after she eats, we feed her a bottle of pumped breastmilk. Maybe an extra 2oz or so. And then I pump some more. Thankfully I do have a small stash of frozen breastmilk saved up, but I'm trying to keep up on pumping to keep up with the extra bottles. It's a lot of work, and I'm doing my best. 

I'm not sure how this coming up week will be since Rob is working a lot and I still have another child that needs a lot of my attention. On Friday I will take her back to the pediatrician for a weight check. So between today and next Friday, I pray that we can figure out something and get some answers. If all my efforts to get her weight up by breastfeeding aren't working, then we will supplement with formula, and I am at peace with that. Like my good and very wise friend said, "Sure breast is best but a baby that isn't hungry is better." 

And 25 years from now, when she's a champion bodybuilder, fitness competitor, ultra-marathoner, triathlete, professional surfer, and/or GOLD MEDAL OLYMPIAN, she will laugh at this silly story. 

Oh, Cora. How we all love you. You are truly a blessing from above and loved beyond measure by so many people. 

happy aloha friday!!

Happy Aloha Friday! Happy 4th of July weekend!

Tomorrow BRIGHT AND EARLY, we'll be heading down to Marine Corps Base Hawaii in Kaneohe for the Runway Run 5k. I'll be pushing both babes in the stroller. I doubt there will be much running from me, but I'm very excited to a.) run down a runway #aviationnerd and b.) see friends I haven't seen in too long!!

Other than the race, I truly don't know what our plans are this weekend. What I do know is that there are NO fireworks for the public to see on the west side of the island. HUGE WOMP WOMP. C'mon Oahu. There ARE fireworks at Ko'olina, but for "resort guests" (and residents) only. We're thinking we might be able to catch a glimpse of them from the top of the hill we live on, so we'll see. Or we won't see. However, I am fairly certain we will be BBQing tomorrow night, and that neighbors have fireworks. Possibly illegal kine, so either way, I'm sure we'll get some sort of show.

Cora has her 2 month well-baby visit this morning, and I have my 2nd "back to blonde" hair appointment this afternoon. Woot woot! Because although I know it's a process, especially since my hair was basically a freshly dyed red, I am getting a little tired of looking at my orangish roots.

This past week was so much fun! I was fiiiiiinally able to get out and surf. It's been too long. Way too long, and I definitely felt rusty. My arms were so spent after just a few minutes of paddling, and my abs still hurt a few days later. My legs felt like they were made of lead when I walked out of the water. Clearly, I am out of shape. Especially surf shape. And I was just on a longboard. So, in case any of you were wondering, SURFING is why my husband is literally in the best shape ever and will not be sporting the Dad Bod.

Yesterday as part of an outing of the MOMs Club I'm a member of, we got free SUP lessons courtesy of Uncle George, which is part of his ministry. I HIGHLY recommend anyone visiting Oahu, or people that live here and haven't done this, to take one of his free lessons. Listen to his story. It's beautiful. And I mean, the view. You really can't beat it.

On Monday, I'll be starting (and documenting) my journey using the exercise program 21 Day Fix EXTREME. I'm part of a July challenge group, and I'm seriously stoked to do this! 

Have a wonderful 4th of July weekend! Be safe!

Aloha!